Is It Abuse? How to Figure Out Whether Your Relationship Crosses the Line

Wondering if you’re over reacting? Or is actual abuse occurring in your relationship?

Here are the 3 types of abuse or dating violence you should be aware of.

Physical abuse:

When your partner dangerously places their hands on you. This includes but not limited to: choking, slapping, punching, shoving, throwing things at you, etc.

Even rough horse playing can lead to physical abuse.

Even if you defend yourself and your partner apologizes, if you are in pain or have a mark on you, it is still a form of physical abuse; especially if it’s done multiple times.

Healthy Physical TouchUnhealthy Physical Touch
Hug as much as possibleLeave bruises, marks, etc.
Softly caress each others skinWrestle Aggressively
Play with their hair“Play Fight”
Hold handsThrow items at each other

Sexual abuse:

When you’re partner forces you to have sexual intercourse without consent. This also includes non physical acts of sexual behavior such as demanding to send nude pictures.

Healthy Sexual CommentsUnhealthy Physical Touch
Do you feel comfortable?Come on, just one time
Is this OK?You better do this or else …
Tell me when to stopIf you don’t do this, I’ll …
If you’re not ready, that’s OK.If you love me you would’ve …

Remember, it is your body and you have the right to say “no” even if you’ve already started something sexually and want it to stop. They must respect your choice at ANY time.

Emotional abuse:

When your partner belittles you, your thoughts, your comments, your friends, your family and/or your opinions. When anything you say or do is not right or good enough. Which means, you’re partner is “the best”, is “never wrong”, and is “above you and any person you know in every shape or form.”

Isolation, name calling, manipulating, or demanding for you to do something are also signs of emotional abuse.

Emotional abuse is the hardest to distinguish because they are no marks, bruises, or physical trauma to the body. With that being said, it is still abuse and impacts your mental health just as physical abuse would.

Healthy Emotional Comments Unhealthy Emotional Comments
You’re beautifulYou’re crazy
I’m so proud of youYou don’t know what you’re talking about
Are you OK?Stop overreacting
I understandYou’re so sensitive

Unhealthy emotional words happen very subtly. Unhealthy emotional comments like the ones above, can slowly begin to make you lose self-esteem and believe the person is “right,” which may lead to more isolation.

If you believe you are not “over reacting” after reading this blog and would like more information or assistance in removing yourself from a toxic relationship, please contact the follow resources:

National Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673)

National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)

National Dating Abuse Hotline: 1-866-331-9474 or visit www.loveisrespect.com or text loveis to 2522

Remember, you are not alone and deserve to be happy and in a healthy relationship! If speaking to a Mental Health Professional may be helpful, please seek a mental health professional in your area or contact me at 786.519.4375.

All material on this website are designed for educational and informational purpose only. This website does not constitute medical advice or professional services. The information provided here should not be used for the purposes of diagnosis or treating a medical or psychiatric illness. The primary goal is providing educational material on this website to help children, teenagers, and families make an informed decision about the services and approach Bloom Sooner offers. It is not, nor is it intended to be, a substitute for medical advice.Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have in regards to a medical condition. Do not disregard medical advice from your physician or health care provider because of what you read on our website. If you are in need of a mental health professional please seek a Licensed clinician. If you or your child is experiencing any mental health or physical crisis, contact 911.

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